Happy New Year! Are you receiving all kinds of goal and resolution messages? I am! And it is appropriate to aim at a new year with new hopes, dreams, and aspirations. But we can't do that - at least effectively - if we don't first look back at how we met - or didn't quite - our goals from the old year.
As I look back on my 2007 goals - which I keep posted above my desk so they stay in my face - I have to ask myself some questions. What goals did I meet entirely? What did I make progress on? What was an unrealistic goal that led nowhere? What still needs to be done that I have not yet addressed?
Goals met entirely - not many I'm afraid. In fact, were I a tough grader like my 5th grade teacher Mrs. Malone (from whom I learned a lot!), I wouldn't give myself 100% on much. I taught three child care classes, I found other ways to make money, I cultivated professional relationships, bought a new higher resolution camera (when my old one broke on a trip to Arizona) attended my mentor Sid Simon's 80th birthday celebration, got new carpet in my living room, and kayaked the length of Canandaigua Lake! These things I did entirely! Oh - and before the end of the day (which surely counts) I will have completed a family history of my maternal grandparents which I will wrap and pack up tomorrow to be mailed out on Wednesday. Whew! Just under the wire on that one!
I made much progress on a whole host of other goals. I haven't swum 100 miles this year, but I think my count is between 60-70. I didn't get 100% on my goal of exercising 300 minutes a week either, but my annual total (not counting my swim today) was 13,602 minutes which averaged out to be 262 minutes per week. Wow! I did better than I thought I did - and way better than I'd have done without that 300 goal dangling in my face every week!
Another goal I didn't do perfectly, but which still pleases me, is writing something every month for our writers group. It has been such a good goal for me. I've probably written at least four times as much and as often just because I knew I'd be seeing my fellow writers.
And there's a whole long list of goals that I though I'd get to this year but didn't. For some the reasons were beyond my control. Other goals, written in January last year, were supplanted by ideas that held more appeal and doability. And another list - a lot longer than I'd like - fell victim to my propensity to procrastinate.
Still and all, it feels good to look back, knowing that I accomplished more in 2007 because of the goals I set. So my task in the next week is to keep reflecting - on the goals I met and those still unmet. Knowing that much of what happens in my life is not within my control - in the coming year or any other - I need to decide what things I want more of and what things I want less of in my life - and how I might exercise my self-control to get what I want.
As long as I'm doing true confessions about the things I've done and haven't done this year, I might as well confess that this goal-setting business is a bit of a chore every year. I have to psych myself up for it - because I know it's a chore worth doing.
I'll keep you posted on the chore's progress. What's your plan for setting goals in 2008? May you set goals that will stretch you and make 2008 the best year of your life - so far!
Happy and Blessed New Year!
Monday, December 31, 2007
Monday, December 17, 2007
Monday Moment - Dance Around Your Fear
You might remember that back in October I wrote about making an appointment with a podiatrist to deal with some nagging foot pain. Sometimes it takes a little pain to make us aware that it's time to change something. I guess the trick is to not wait till a little pain becomes a lot of pain!
I had my second appointment with my podiatrist today, and as I told him, the pain is probably 60-70% better. He assures me that we can easily get to 85% better - and we can stop treatment when I decide that it's livable.
It's actually livable right now - but why would I settle for just livable when I could get to dance-able? Nope. For me the ability to dance - even if I don't do it nearly as often as I'd like to - is one of the component of livable.
As is not settling for mediocre when excellence is within sights. That's livable!
But of course that's only when I'm in my most evolved state of being. And one of the things that prevents my highest levels of evolution - time and time again - is procrastination. Like putting off making an appointment until my foot hurts - a lot!
Among the long list of excuses I can generate for putting things off is almost always an element of fear. In this case, I had convinced myself that my particular pain wasn't likely to be solved without surgery. And that very idea - or more precisely the fear of that idea - was enough to introduce thoughts of just about any other far more pressing task any time I was about to pick up the phone.
Dumb fear! I heard it once described as False Evidence Appearing Real. I don't even need enough to build a strong case for evidence. Those bricks could be made mostly out of straw and I can still construct enough fear to slam on the brakes on even the smartest idea.
Today's appointment chipped away a little more of my ridiculous habit of fear. No surgery. At most, it's taken a couple moments of discomfort to restore not just livability but dance-ability!
I'm reminded of an idea I read as a teenager - in a silly romance novel. "Granny Tremain's disappearing hills" are the hills that look too steep and too high to climb when we see them coming at us from a distance. But when we get up close, we realize that they aren't so steep, they're not so high, they practically disappear.
I think maybe - for awhile at least - I'll remember that I do not have to settle for fear. Instead - I can dance!
May you dance through your week as well!
I had my second appointment with my podiatrist today, and as I told him, the pain is probably 60-70% better. He assures me that we can easily get to 85% better - and we can stop treatment when I decide that it's livable.
It's actually livable right now - but why would I settle for just livable when I could get to dance-able? Nope. For me the ability to dance - even if I don't do it nearly as often as I'd like to - is one of the component of livable.
As is not settling for mediocre when excellence is within sights. That's livable!
But of course that's only when I'm in my most evolved state of being. And one of the things that prevents my highest levels of evolution - time and time again - is procrastination. Like putting off making an appointment until my foot hurts - a lot!
Among the long list of excuses I can generate for putting things off is almost always an element of fear. In this case, I had convinced myself that my particular pain wasn't likely to be solved without surgery. And that very idea - or more precisely the fear of that idea - was enough to introduce thoughts of just about any other far more pressing task any time I was about to pick up the phone.
Dumb fear! I heard it once described as False Evidence Appearing Real. I don't even need enough to build a strong case for evidence. Those bricks could be made mostly out of straw and I can still construct enough fear to slam on the brakes on even the smartest idea.
Today's appointment chipped away a little more of my ridiculous habit of fear. No surgery. At most, it's taken a couple moments of discomfort to restore not just livability but dance-ability!
I'm reminded of an idea I read as a teenager - in a silly romance novel. "Granny Tremain's disappearing hills" are the hills that look too steep and too high to climb when we see them coming at us from a distance. But when we get up close, we realize that they aren't so steep, they're not so high, they practically disappear.
I think maybe - for awhile at least - I'll remember that I do not have to settle for fear. Instead - I can dance!
May you dance through your week as well!
Monday, December 10, 2007
Monday Moment - To Promote True Peace
This week's Monday Moment is about the health of our planet and is the direct result of my reading a remarkable book titled Three Cups of Tea by Greg Mortenson and David Oliver Relin.
I read a lot - for both fun and information - so finding a book I enjoy is no rare thing. I often want to pass along books I've read, but I can't remember a book that inspired sharing quite as much as this one has. I'd like every man and woman in Congress to read it, every soldier, every philanthropist, every American citizen - because I think the true story of how Greg Mortenson has been building schools in the poorest and most remote areas of Pakistan and Afghanistan carries more hope of making America safe than all of the billions we've spent on the Iraq war or homeland security.
Like most Americans, I've been - until now - convinced that Muslims in the world hate us. It's not a huge leap to reach that conclusion. Nearly everything we read talks about basic conflicts of values and the mass production of young men and women who are willing to lose their lives in order to inflict harm on Americans and on those who support us.
But now, I've learned that in places where such distrust and hate might fester, children - boys and more remarkably girls - are having the chance to go to school and to believe - deep in their marrow - that at least one American wants the very best for them. Mortenson's Central Asia Institute builds a school for around $12,000 - and children and their families learn we Americans are not so bad. I call that a great investment!
Perhaps the most gripping thing about Mortenson's story is that he didn't go out seeking his cause. Instead his cause found him. When he found himself stranded in a Pakistani village - and the story of how he got there is pretty fascinating in and of itself - he might have accepted the people's kindness and generosity and been on his way. But when he saw children so eager to learn that they huddled on the ground practicing lessons on their own because they had no teacher - that's when he vowed to return kindness with kindness.
This was an ordinary guy - living a hand-to-mouth existence back in the States - and he had no clue how to go about keeping his promise to children half a world away. He blundered, stumbled, and made mistakes, but he did not, would not, could not give up the goal of helping this one village - despite incredible personal cost. And then one village became dozens until now 24,000 students attend schools that are fully or partially supported by the Central Asia Institute.
I heartily recommend Three Cups of Tea - as a good read and as a lesson in what one person can do to promote peace. I've struggled with what I can do. I haven't - until now - felt that I could win the hearts of Muslims. I've not been able to support what I see as a destructive and counterproductive war, but nor have I been able to stop it. But I certainly can and will support the Central Asia Institute's efforts to offer a balanced education to some of our planet's poorest children.
And I can and do ask you to also read Three Cups of Tea and hope that you will be similarly inspired by its message of hope.
I read a lot - for both fun and information - so finding a book I enjoy is no rare thing. I often want to pass along books I've read, but I can't remember a book that inspired sharing quite as much as this one has. I'd like every man and woman in Congress to read it, every soldier, every philanthropist, every American citizen - because I think the true story of how Greg Mortenson has been building schools in the poorest and most remote areas of Pakistan and Afghanistan carries more hope of making America safe than all of the billions we've spent on the Iraq war or homeland security.
Like most Americans, I've been - until now - convinced that Muslims in the world hate us. It's not a huge leap to reach that conclusion. Nearly everything we read talks about basic conflicts of values and the mass production of young men and women who are willing to lose their lives in order to inflict harm on Americans and on those who support us.
But now, I've learned that in places where such distrust and hate might fester, children - boys and more remarkably girls - are having the chance to go to school and to believe - deep in their marrow - that at least one American wants the very best for them. Mortenson's Central Asia Institute builds a school for around $12,000 - and children and their families learn we Americans are not so bad. I call that a great investment!
Perhaps the most gripping thing about Mortenson's story is that he didn't go out seeking his cause. Instead his cause found him. When he found himself stranded in a Pakistani village - and the story of how he got there is pretty fascinating in and of itself - he might have accepted the people's kindness and generosity and been on his way. But when he saw children so eager to learn that they huddled on the ground practicing lessons on their own because they had no teacher - that's when he vowed to return kindness with kindness.
This was an ordinary guy - living a hand-to-mouth existence back in the States - and he had no clue how to go about keeping his promise to children half a world away. He blundered, stumbled, and made mistakes, but he did not, would not, could not give up the goal of helping this one village - despite incredible personal cost. And then one village became dozens until now 24,000 students attend schools that are fully or partially supported by the Central Asia Institute.
I heartily recommend Three Cups of Tea - as a good read and as a lesson in what one person can do to promote peace. I've struggled with what I can do. I haven't - until now - felt that I could win the hearts of Muslims. I've not been able to support what I see as a destructive and counterproductive war, but nor have I been able to stop it. But I certainly can and will support the Central Asia Institute's efforts to offer a balanced education to some of our planet's poorest children.
And I can and do ask you to also read Three Cups of Tea and hope that you will be similarly inspired by its message of hope.
Monday, December 3, 2007
Monday Moment - Deeper Connections
Yesterday, I ran into some old friends - folks that I used to see nearly every Sunday as we rehearsed for a song and dance variety show but haven't seen in perhaps as many as 5 years. And we live at most 5 miles apart!
It was so good to see them! Standing there in the grocery store, we reminisced about the songs we sang, the people we knew, even the costumes we used to wear. And we did a superficial catch-up... How are you? Have you been well? The kids? How many grandkids now? What are you doing for work?
But superficial connection is about all I can ever accomplish at the grocery store - and I was left feeling warm to have reacquainted myself with my friends' lives but not fully satisfied. It was like eating a candy bar when one is truly hungry. It tastes sweet and lovely, but it doesn't fill one up.
Fortunately - I guess - I've felt this feeling before and have long had a goal to forge deeper connections with people I like and admire. So before our conversation ended yesterday, I pushed us all to agree to get together. But it was more than, "We must get together!" It was, "Let's get together - and let's do it..." I had to do some fast thinking. Will we have time for another engagement before the winter holidays? Will they? Probably not. Hmmm... I don't really know my January calendar yet - but hmmm... not the first weekend, too soon. Not later in the month, I know there's something going on then. Hmmm... "How about the second weekend in January?" I blurted out.
It was a lucky stab at a date. It works for us all - and hooray, there's one more thing to look forward to in 2008! And a reminder to me that the goal of making time for friends - and making the effort to carve into schedules to actually do it - is absolutely a goal that I want on my 2008 list. Next year at this time, I want to look back at a series of connecting gatherings - and not be wondering why I haven't seen people for almost 5 years!
It's easy to let time go by - to think that there's plenty of time ahead. But if I were to start counting my life to come in 5 year intervals, there's not enough time to spend with people I like and admire. Even if I live to 103, if I only get together with some people every 5 years or so, I'm going to be having that same candy bar feeling at the end of my life as I experienced yesterday. Not good enough!
So I'm already off to a good start with a date set for mid January, 2008. And I do believe a lesson has been learned - at least for the time being. For the reminding nudges I need - well, maybe I'll just have to hang out at the grocery store more often!
Wishing you a connected week!
Sally
It was so good to see them! Standing there in the grocery store, we reminisced about the songs we sang, the people we knew, even the costumes we used to wear. And we did a superficial catch-up... How are you? Have you been well? The kids? How many grandkids now? What are you doing for work?
But superficial connection is about all I can ever accomplish at the grocery store - and I was left feeling warm to have reacquainted myself with my friends' lives but not fully satisfied. It was like eating a candy bar when one is truly hungry. It tastes sweet and lovely, but it doesn't fill one up.
Fortunately - I guess - I've felt this feeling before and have long had a goal to forge deeper connections with people I like and admire. So before our conversation ended yesterday, I pushed us all to agree to get together. But it was more than, "We must get together!" It was, "Let's get together - and let's do it..." I had to do some fast thinking. Will we have time for another engagement before the winter holidays? Will they? Probably not. Hmmm... I don't really know my January calendar yet - but hmmm... not the first weekend, too soon. Not later in the month, I know there's something going on then. Hmmm... "How about the second weekend in January?" I blurted out.
It was a lucky stab at a date. It works for us all - and hooray, there's one more thing to look forward to in 2008! And a reminder to me that the goal of making time for friends - and making the effort to carve into schedules to actually do it - is absolutely a goal that I want on my 2008 list. Next year at this time, I want to look back at a series of connecting gatherings - and not be wondering why I haven't seen people for almost 5 years!
It's easy to let time go by - to think that there's plenty of time ahead. But if I were to start counting my life to come in 5 year intervals, there's not enough time to spend with people I like and admire. Even if I live to 103, if I only get together with some people every 5 years or so, I'm going to be having that same candy bar feeling at the end of my life as I experienced yesterday. Not good enough!
So I'm already off to a good start with a date set for mid January, 2008. And I do believe a lesson has been learned - at least for the time being. For the reminding nudges I need - well, maybe I'll just have to hang out at the grocery store more often!
Wishing you a connected week!
Sally
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